The only one he trusts (Bailiee)

[lizzie6]

Lately Lysander was having very bad days to the point where he found his self unable to do much of anything, and that included even going outside and doing work. His grades were slowly slipping, due to procrastination and just being plain old lazy. It was starting to slowly become a problem, as his grades were only very slowly becoming lower and he continued having thoughts of suicide. It was a very possible thing with him, and a lot of people knew that, or at least some people knew that. To most people it was a secret, you only knew if you heard about his failed attempt last year. He was placed on suicide watch and his parents began to always worry about him, for once in his life his parents actually cared.

His parents, they were hardly ever around and always very busy so he never really saw them. When he had his suicide attempt he found his self under constant watch, his parents always thought that if he tried suicide once he would easily try suicide again. They were surprised their son even had these things in mind, suicide and death were two very real things. It didn’t scare him or worry him either, because he wanted that and he hoped for that. He knew people would care about his absence, but he didn’t and he never could get his self to care for even a minute. He never cared about the fact he could be upsetting over people with his actions, he just knew his own feelings and thoughts at the time and they were normally not positive feelings either.

Sitting down at the park he glanced around at all the people at the park, a lot of said people were little kids playing with their friends and it made him almost laugh. Little did those little kids know someday those friends would be no more and they would find themselves getting their hearts broken by people they only thought they loved, running his fingers through his hear he sighed. Little kids had it so easy in his mind, if only they knew why life would be like in the future though, no such thing as fairy tale endings.

[sarahh]

bailee sighed softly to herself, looking down at the notebook in her hands. she was working on an assignment for history, and she wasn't happy with herself right now. all day she had been trying to think of a good thesis sentence for an essay she had to write. it wasn't working well for her. the topic on something she wasn't interested in, and she was sick of trying to waste her time trying to get this right. tearing a piece of paper from her notebook, she crumpled it up, throwing the piece of paper to her trash bin. except, she missed. groaning, she got up and picked up the crumbled ball, dropping it into the trash can. standing up, she made her way over to her closet, picking up a pull over, putting it on over a black tank top that she was wearing. then she raided her closet and found a cute pair of flats. once she knew that she looked all right, bailee made her way out of her house, heading down to the park.

it was a pretty day out, but bailee was fond of the rain. she loved dancing in the rain, and she just loved sitting inside by the fire when there was a storm. back when she was younger, bailee loved to laugh at all of her friends who were scared of storms. bailee had never been like that. a brave girl was what bailee was. pulling her pullover closer, bailee looked at her surroundings as she passed many shops and food places. the only thing she hated about the walk to the park was that from where she lived, she had to go through the town to get there. it wasn't that bailee didn't like people, but most of the time people bothered her when she was on her way there. people loved talking, especially to bailee for some reason. bailee looked around, no one in sight. this was good because it meant she would be at the park quicker.

reaching the park, bailee turned her head to see if she could recognize anyone that she knew from school. before she could see anyone, a little kid ran into her leg, and fell backwards. bailee blinked in surprise before reaching down and helping the little boy back up. she then helped the boy back to his parents that he was pointing to. smiling after returning the boy, she made her way over to a bench, flopping down. she looked beside her, at the boy next to her who was on the bench when she sat down. "lysander!" she exclaimed with a lot of enthusiasm. she had meet him awhile back, and she thought that he was a good guy.

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[lizzie6]

Lysander was not much of a talker, he was more of a listener and would rather just sit and listen to people talk instead of ever dare and talk to them. His biggest issue with that was the fact he never really seemed to know what to say and he surely didn’t want to sound dumb if he ended up saying the wrong thing to something, which with the seventeen year old it was a really easy thing. No, the person he did seem to talk to was Bailee, she was this girl he met a while ago and she really seemed easy for him to talk to when he needed someone to talk to about his problems that were on in his life and there were many of them to. His life was just full of problems and issues and he couldn’t help but always things about them.

Lysander wasn’t brave, and he wasn’t the strongest person ever and his parents weren’t always around. He was use to it, but sometimes he really did wish things were different and that fueled some of the reasons why he was the way he was. He couldn’t really seem to help it anymore, he was born a certain way and that was the way he lived his life. Sighing he stared down at his shoes digging his heel into the dirt below his feet, it rained a few days ago so the ground was only finally fully dry. He liked the rain, but he didn’t like when it rained a few days in a row. Looking up when someone said his name, he turned his head to look at who was now sitting beside him.

“Bailee hey” Lysander faked a smile, a lot of his smiles were fake. It was just the kind of smile he was best at, “what brings you out here today?” he added just looking at her still.

[sarahh]

bailee could talk, but only to people that she was comfortable around. other than that, she kinda kept her distance from people. bailee feared that if she opened up to someone that didn;t like her, then they would go behind her back and tell someone something that she didn't want anyone to know. bailee kept her distance from people, though she loved to make new friends. it was a weird situation. once she got to know someone, she was the most talkative person that you could meet. there was only a few times when she clicked with someone instantly, and when she did she knew that it was a good sign. bailee reached in her bag and checked her text messages, hoping that no one needed her. as she had no messages, she was sure that she was good.

putting her phone back in her bag, she turned to look at lysander. "how have you been?" she smiled. bailee knew that lysander went through a lot, and when she saw him she wanted to make him as happy as she could. "how's school treating you?" she added, trying to make conversation. bailee had a small crush on lysander, but she wasn't the type of girl who was confident enough to tell people how she felt. taking a small breath, she ran her fingers through her hair again. it was a habit she was growing into, and she really wanted to quit it. it wasn't as bad as her biting her nails, and she was sure that it could get much worse. bailee crossed one leg over the other, turning to look at lysander.

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[lizzie6]

Lysander wasn’t really one for really talking at all, to anyone. Due to a shy nature he held, he would much rather avoid situations that forced him to speak instead of holding a conversation with someone. It just brought him out of his comfort zone when he had to talk. It was never something he liked to do; he was one of those people who knew how to keep their distance and hardly talked in till someone talked to him first. Sure he didn’t get a lot of friends that way but it didn’t bother him, he wasn’t always one for making friends either. He felt the friends he had were just good enough for him, he didn’t need to popular with a lot of friends because that just wasn’t his style at all. He was a quiet person, so he didn’t need to always be surrounded by talkative people and in fact Bailee was the most talkative person he knew sometimes.

“I’ve been alright actually, still here and hanging in there taking each day one step at a time. It’s a slow process but I think I’ll be alright, you have nothing to worry” he said quietly looking at her. Bailee was one of the very few people that knew of his suicide attempts and he wasn’t all that sure what she thought about it, he was sure it wasn’t good though. “School’s been okay I guess a little boring and the people in school are just not nice sometimes” he just shrugged sighing a little bit. School was really hard sometimes, dealing with all the school work and people who enjoyed giving everyone a hard time. It really got on your nerves; it was hard for it not to.

[sarahh]

when bailee was younger, people bulled her, but she had to rise above it. people told her that she was fat and ugly, but her family and friends helped her through it. bailee didn't think she was ugly, but she didn't think that she was gorgeous either. she was just herself. bailee didn't really worry about how she looked anymore. of course, she spent her time doing her hair and makeup, but besides that she just didn't care. sometimes she wondered if she ever looked bad, but her friends always complimented on her rocker style, and they way that she dressed. so yes, she was pretty happy with herself at the moment. however, bailee really worried about lysander. he was a great guy and she didn't want him to kill himself. to bailee, he had so much to live for. he was still young, and able to explore the world.

"people will seriously do anything to bring someone down. usually it means they're insecure or something," bailee said, looking at lysander. bailee couldn't think of any other reason why people would take the time to bully someone. bailee played with a strand of her hair, taking a small breath, letting the fresh air hit her lungs. "i just want high school to be over with, so i can go to college," she nodded. music was bailee's number one passion, and she loved to sing and write songs. she wasn't sure if she was any good, but she didn't care. she loved the feeling that music gave her. bailee played with nails a little bit, trying to get a hang nail off. finally, she pulled it off and gave a little grimace from the small amount of pain that the nail had given her.

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[lizzie6]

Lysander couldn’t say he wasn’t use to bullying, but even after the years of harsh bullying and being beaten down by so many people in his life he still let it get too him. Sure he knew that wasn’t the right or even the best thing to do but it was really hard not too sometimes and he knew people out there did care about him and some people did have it a lot worse than he did. Course he never wanted to believe that sometimes though, because when you are so unhappy you just wish you were dead you feel there is no one out there who could have it worse than you do at that very moment in time and sighing he nodded a little bit laying his head on the back of the bench he was sitting on turning his head to look at Bailee.

“I know what you mean Bailee” he frowned a little bit nodding a little, of course he knew what she meant since he did witness it firsthand. Every day it only seemed as if the bullies only got cleverer, or they got stupider in their insulting using things that they already used before to the point it didn’t even matter anymore. After hearing it so many times it just became an everyday thing and the bullies only became more childish, of course there were the few people who still got to him and that were his problem now. “Just think, there’s only this year and next year and then we are free at last. If I can make it that far” he muttered.